View Full Version : I want a Hearse!

06-30-2004, 10:21 PM
I have had the urge to buy a hearse for some reason. To drive around as a normal day driver. Anyone know where i can find em. For cheap though. What kind of gas mileage does a hearse get? hehehehehe. is it wrong that i want to drive a hearse around?

06-30-2004, 10:39 PM
Cincinnati has a rather large hearse dealership. one of my actors just bought an 88 oldsmobile from them for like $1500 . they do have a website, but i can't remember that address right now but i'm sure someone out there does.
dave b

07-01-2004, 12:50 AM
I believe the web site is www.cwcoach.com

Jim Warfield
07-01-2004, 07:58 AM
I was recently given a hearse, a 1957 Cadillac with a Superior body, it would go 120 MPH, if it was dropped out the back of a big cargo plane and achieved terminal velocity, it don't run, but it looks neat.
I'm debating whether to paint it glossy black or leave it flat-faded black.
Everytime it rains and it looks shiney I kinda think it should be painted to look this way all the time?
What does anyone else think?
No, a "Partridge Family" paint job really doesn't do it for me as someone here (here in Mount Carroll, Ill.) suggested
Right now a skeleton driver is being asked by two smaller skeletons in the back-seat area(there is no backseat) "Are we there yet?"
It was a glorious day yesterday! I finally got my Spookmobile back! It now has a rebuilt engine, transmission, new radiator and gas tank!
I can go someplace and make it back!
This is "Spookmobile" #2, the Olds station wagon, the sausage-semi-impacted "Spookmobile #1"Thunderbird won't be rebuilt, well maybe someday by archeologists to see what this dinosaur really looked like!

07-01-2004, 02:51 PM
Bob, speaking from experience while a hearse may seem like a cool thing to ride around in but be prepared for some flak from people. Its one of those things that you either like or hate. I have gotten "thumbs up" from people and I have also come out from a store to find my ride key scratched "devil worshiper". Older hearses will get around 8-12 MPG so be ready to visit the gas pumps often. They are also a cop magnet BIG TIME! You will be getting pulled over for the smallest thing so its not a wise choice to be driving around after having a drink or two.
I leave mine parked untill Oct. with the exeption of a couple hearse club activities I go to. People seem to accept it more closer to Halloween. Not trying to talk you out of it just be aware of the possible headaches you may be getting into.

07-01-2004, 05:48 PM
i guess cincinnati is hearse central.

Frank Weidman
07-01-2004, 05:58 PM
Well I just talked to my wife and she said I can buy one...so that is my end of the summer goal is to have a hearse!

Seats can be added in the back to seat 5 kids rights?

:twisted: I am getting a hearse!!!


Jim Warfield
07-01-2004, 06:42 PM
Some racing stripes down the middle of the hood, wide ones and some dark window tint (for privacy) be sure and get a supply of glowing skull masks for the kids to wear on trips at night.
The common stigma of a hearse might keep the price down for a really well-built automotive product with low-miles and a fantastic maintenance record going for it? (Can't have the hearse stopped along the funereal route with a dead passenger in the back, it would be unseemly.)
I was told this story by a doctor who grew up in a small town in the northern part of the USA.
A mortician went to a convention in a distant city and killing two birds with one stone he also picked up a body that had to come back.
The mortician was not much of a "drinker", but happened to be pretty drunk on his return drive through a fresh snowstorm that left not much of a lane open, whereas the snow was plowed very high creating sort of a tunnel-effect. (the reason I was told this story was because my Olds station wagon was the car used by many small town morticians for a hearse)
The car got a flat.
The drunken mortician had to pull the coffin from the car to get the spare tire.
Imagine the state police's astonishment when they found a coffin standing upright along the highway in the deep snow, complete with a dead body inside of it!
It didn't require a forensics lab to drive down the road, catch up to the drunken mortician and figure everything out.
This story doesnot have a "happy" ending , quit reading now if you wish.
The small-town mortician was so beside himself over his mistakes with the body that he commited suicide in his jail cell.
I didn't like this ending either, but then that is the chance true stories may inflict upon us as we read them or hear them.
Moral of the story.."Embalming Fluid" belongs in the dead, not the living.?

Jim Warfield
07-02-2004, 05:34 PM
Last night while looking at some hearses on-line I saw some really neat cars, the hearses with the "carved, sculpted sides. Were those sculpted sides carved from wood? They sure could have been back in the 1930's and 40's when these cars were built.
I also liked some of those "Flower Cars", these tremendous "Rancheros" with the seating for two(or it at least looks like just a two-some seating)
Such a flower car would be neat to own, stylish, yet practical as far as being about able to come home from the lumberyard with those sheets of on-sale plywood in the back.
Using a flower car to do grave yard tours for tourists riding in the open air back would be extra creepy for some of them, I'm sure.
Then again, going Zombie Hunting with twin 50 cal.s mounted in that large open space behind the driver, in the grave yard could be memorable too! (Camoflauge the twin 50's with those "Flowers!") There we go!

Lord Barnabus
07-03-2004, 12:54 PM
And if you have a dead body in the back, you can drive in the car pool lane :twisted:

07-03-2004, 01:58 PM
Umm Hearseman darlin' ... it's not wise to drive after having a drink or two no matter what you drive :)
I am not advocating drinking and driving, I was merely pointing out that a hearse would sometimes get you pulled over for no reason and why take chances getting in trouble.

Bob, here is an interesting link for more info. http://members.aol.com/hearseq/hearsefaq.htm
Also something to think about before buying and Jim touched on it a little is that vehicle maintenance is sometimes going to be more expensive than on a regular car. Almost all hearses are built on what is called a "commercial" chassis. Some parts are more heavy duty than the normal car parts are and sometimes it is difficult finding the right replacement parts for a commercial chassis.

Jim Warfield
07-03-2004, 05:50 PM
Now you can see pictures of my hearse on our website:
hauntedravensgrin.com just put on.......

07-03-2004, 07:27 PM
cool hearse jim! now to break the rest of the windows! lol