View Full Version : Advice on what to say?

Dr. Giggles
07-13-2008, 10:21 PM
Hey everybody,

This year im Playing Nic Nak the Klown. Im a wonderer in a HUUUUGGGE haunt, roughly 10,000 square feet. My character is an acute schizophrenic who talks to himself inccessantly, scary, loud and always willing to play a game...or atleast thats as far as iv gotten with the chracter. But im honestly kind of sick of running up to people screaming in their face then skipping off. I need an ideas for lines i can say to people. Because in this haunt i need to divert their attention for an extended period of time. So i need lines that i can pick on people with. HELP!

Thanks everybody.

-Zackary J

07-13-2008, 11:23 PM
Dont you love my family? whats wrong? did we scare you? YOUR GOING TO LOVE MY FAMILY, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT?? YOUR NEXT!!!

do you smell that fresh blood in the air? Im so thirsty now....I gotta feed....
Im so hungry.....wait....CAN I HAVE YOURS???

IM SO READY FOR TONIGHT!!! I've been ingesting gasoline all day today!!! you wanna see my final act? DO YA????

(pull out lighter, and begin to light it, with your mouth open)


nik nak, paddy wack, give the dead a bone,
are you ready to SEE HELL!?!

Dr. Giggles
07-14-2008, 01:09 AM
I really like those lines! Thanks for the help Phreakout! Its really usefull!

Thanks a bunch! Its really appreciated!

-Zackary J

07-14-2008, 05:01 PM
I really like those lines! Thanks for the help Phreakout! Its really usefull!

Thanks a bunch! Its really appreciated!

-Zackary J

I was actually planning to be a clown this year, so I came up with those a while back. Now that my roles have changed, I've gotta come up with more. I do plan to use that gasoline one though :D

Jim Warfield
07-14-2008, 06:52 PM
"Do you think that this is "Grease Paint?"
No, it's much fouler than that, it's "Crease" paint!
Take a whiff as I slip you a kiss, see if you can identify which crease it came from?

Dr. Giggles
07-22-2008, 02:34 PM
I want to scare them, not make them sick Jim....

haha but its appreciated anyway.

-Zackary J

Jim Warfield
07-23-2008, 02:07 AM
"Crease paint" would not be something normally heard in everyday conversations, which might make it "scary" to many people as they doubt your grip on sanity.
I actually think fewer words of any kind, the better, then substitute a long look, and small movements of the face, creating usually an aukward silence. This is something that I would love to try sometime, if I didn't have to be talking non-stop for 90 minutes+plus for every tour, that is....
Tonight during the front room act (in total darkness) I was speaking slowly with a sing-song quality , then hesistating making a little whispy laugh, I'd stop the laugh, they would think I was going to continue talking, then after a pause, I would laugh again, the same laugh, sort of like I'm catching my breath.
I alternate the true haunted history telling with unrelated goofy remarks and punctuate the true storys with funny comments and changes in voice inflections and even walk around the room on my knees illustrating my "Short little walk" I took to the county courthouse a block from here to check old records on my house.
I also will alternate slow speaking with long pauses with very quick speaking adding some rhyming and alliteration, alternating low, commanding tones with other voices, all pretty much carried on in a totally dark room, I hold the little flashlight and use it to accent and punctuate my performance.
Ever met a scary street person?
Ever been locked in a totally dark room with one?
A room that he knows by heart because it's his room?
See where I find the show and the fear here?
If they still need a new person to play "The Joker", who else besides me has been practising this every night for 20 years?
(Insert laugh-track here~~~~~~!)

07-23-2008, 09:34 AM
When I was a clown in my haunt I inproved alot depending on how the people were acting I loved to insult people. It was entertaining and made everyone else laugh. I figured I would piss off a person or two, but it never happened

Jim Warfield
07-26-2008, 12:49 PM
I always liked the insult:"Don't get into a battle of wits if you have no ammunition!" (Your position will be overrun by infidels!)

"You're CrazY!"
"But You paid Me to be in MY House!?"

07-26-2008, 11:45 PM
After watching The Dark Knight, I seriously plan to act as insane ledger did in the movie.

...you wanna know why I use a knife?...

Dr. Giggles
07-28-2008, 09:24 AM
If that wasnt such a popular movie, id agree with you. But the problem is, since it was so immensly popular people will know that your quoting to movie or using ledgers mannerisms.

07-28-2008, 02:06 PM
Is that the size of the haunted house? Or is it a scream park and thats the size of the whole scream park?

07-28-2008, 11:24 PM
If that wasnt such a popular movie, id agree with you. But the problem is, since it was so immensly popular people will know that your quoting to movie or using ledgers mannerisms.

damn. very good point though.

07-30-2008, 09:14 AM
Don't know where you are in your house, but I got the impression that Niknak might be constantly talking to himself...

clowns.Clowns everybody loves a clown send in the clowns where are the clowns? HERE they are right here, right now and all ready to play games, yes games, what games? Funny games, oh yes, funny. You'll laugh. You will. If you know whats good for you. I can make you laugh or I can MAKE you laugh. And I'd like that. Yes to see you laughing, smiling from ear to ear Laughing so hard your jaw falls off But don't worry, I'm sure we can nail it back on And then you'll be laughing forever. Just Like Me.

Do you have props? An arm? a hand? a decayed head? Start your rant and go up to whoevers' in the room and include this...

Stay with me play with me I'd love it if you did like all the happy children playing with the happy clown(brandish part or parts) Oh, they like to play but they never stay they always wear out and get tired and I get sad AND NO ONE LIKES A SAD CLOWN you'll stay, won't you? play play with the happy clown.

Babbling and ranting creeps out a lot of people. Do something like this, vary your tone at random and you won't need to do the jumpscare. They'll shy away as you approach.

07-30-2008, 07:18 PM
...I always thought the perfect name for a clown would be Fondle...

07-30-2008, 08:41 PM
...I always thought the perfect name for a clown would be Fondle...

i am sooooooo wanting to use that as my name for my character :-D:-D:-D

07-31-2008, 12:22 PM
Go for it man, I think it would be very cool!

Dr. Giggles
07-31-2008, 09:41 PM
...I always thought the perfect name for a clown would be Fondle...

Yes, no doubt. But with that name i doubt parents would let you scare, or even get near their children. LOL!

08-01-2008, 10:41 AM
Why was fondle a character in a movie or something?

Dr. Giggles
08-01-2008, 05:06 PM
Why was fondle a character in a movie or something?
No, but think about it. Fondle....just think about that really hard for a moment!

And incase you dont get it, Fondle is another term to caress something gently and lovingly, usually something smaller then yourself.

08-02-2008, 12:41 AM
I thought fondle meant "happy fun times"

...at least thats what my uncle bill told me when I was young...

....oh god.

Jim Warfield
08-02-2008, 08:25 AM
If a parent makes a negative comment or gives you a suspicious look when they discover your clown name is "Fondle" just say, my first name is "Henry", you have heard of my Daughter Jane Fondle.
Or maybe you could be "Jane Fondle"?
Inventor of the fondue pan?
"Do not spindle, fondle, or bend!" (Remember when those old computer cards would have this printed on them?) Well, "Fondle" wasn't in their list but it should have been.
You remember Henry Fondle, he was in "On Golden Pond", but then every time he stopped moving for 30 seconds there was always a golden pond under him!
"Oh, Kiss me you old coot!"
..and we can't ignore "Peter Fondle"!

08-03-2008, 11:58 AM
No, but think about it. Fondle....just think about that really hard for a moment!

And incase you dont get it, Fondle is another term to caress something gently and lovingly, usually something smaller then yourself.

And to go just a wee bit farther - Is Fondle The Clown going to live up to his/her name towards you, or is he/she hoping you will take the name as a suggestion? Think about it... Fondle the Clown!!!

"Who are you?"
"Fondle The Clown"
"What did you ask me to do?!!??"

Dr. Giggles
08-09-2008, 10:48 AM
Wow that really is a wee bit farther...way to go! Hahahah

-Zackary J

08-09-2008, 12:29 PM
Yeah well I'm just a bit twisted like that...

08-09-2008, 08:36 PM
lmao sounds like everyone likes the name then!

Kevin Dells
08-10-2008, 07:53 PM
I Played a retarded redneck last season. Not nessecarily retarded but more slow as hell ! My hand prop was a big goofey looking stuffed rat. Last season he was Cousin Booger, but this year he's getting a re hab job on costume and make up.

So im giving him a new name,Special Ed. His costume is of course overalls and a new bodyskin shirt im building but for his short bus helmet im going to use a metal kitchen colander for straining noodles

I ran our hayride que line so i was with the crowd for extended periods of time.

People would say "Hey Nice Rat"

"Thats not a rat that my beaver, every guys got to have himself a beaver!"

I had many guys with their dates step into piles of dung by saying something smart arsed In which i would respond "I'll let you hold my beaver if you let me hold yours"

Then i would walk up to their dates all googley eyed and smiling trying to hand off the rat.

Sexual inuendo's with the right groups are my favorites. Very Memorable!

I rode the wagons and narrated the story on a couple nights. In spots where there was a lull period i would pick a person from the wagon and pick on them.

Just strike up the conversation. Loud and obnoxious!

"Hey i know you"!

"Yeah your that guy, i seen you last week."

" You work for UPS!"

:: Don't give them time to respond::

" Yeah i know it was you, cause you was checking out my package !"

People freaking love when you bust on their freinds like that ! Pick the big guy just don't get to close to him!LOL

Jim had also stated earlier i belive page 1 a VERY good tatic that i love and use all the time especially with my Babyman character when i do main midway acting.(much bigger ruthless crowd,scare fast!)

Jim said the stop and stare and contort eyes and face.

For Babyman i do this with all large groups of girls. They see this nasty yet funny lovable character. I walk fast normally with this character often bouncing as I walk. I see the group out of the corner of my eye about 20 - 30 feet away (you know there looking at you because your parting the flesh sea as your stomping through the crowd,people are getting out of your way,kind of scattering.)

Stop suddenley about 30 feet from that group of girls, make sure your body is in a crouched contorted stance, (important) Tilt head one way slowly and eyeball a few in the front as you do it, smiling stupid ass look on your face,

Let out a really loud laugh and then go dead silent tilting your head the opposite way and size a few more up while again standing contorted. ( all those girls are now like deer in headlights, you have them under your control !)

Now take off like a bat out of hell straight at them!

I make a really loud sound like the annoying sound Jim carrey makes in dumb and dumber Wrrrreeeeehhhhhhhhhh!!!! I suck in air and sqweel at the same time a sound i came up with for a past zombie character.

That tactic i swear once youv'e mastered it, is unstoppable in a crowd. Just roam doing that creature or whatever it would work for almost any goblin ghoul, zombie whatever really. Not just babyman type characters, that was just a for instance.

I have also worked with a girl that had a small birdcage with a miniature pumpkin in it, she talked to it all night as she roamed. Verry cool schpeel !

So theres a few tips i actually teach at my acting seminars,hope they help.

Dr. Giggles
08-10-2008, 10:16 PM
Wow, very nice tactics. Thanks very much!

-Zackary J

Jim Warfield
08-12-2008, 08:55 AM
The haunt can be the most fantastic place around for 500 miles , yet many customers will only remember that one actor who did that one thing or said that one little thing that night.
Maybe this is something to keep in the forefront of an actor's mind to avoid getting discouraged or to keep you energized when you begin to run out of steam.
I guess I'm trying to make sure my customers leave my show with memories they won't be losing for awhile.
It always struck me as ironic when I would have to put up with some customers trying to be weasels and insisting upon discounts from my very resonable admission price, then half-way through the tour they are singing my praises for all to hear , yet there they were earlier wishing to not keep me financially viable and here for them the next time?
I like to bask in the personal fantasy that a conversion of attitude took place because of my certain abillitys , whether so or not, I tell myself this to try to erase the weasel-ness memory from our recent, first encounter, gotta stay "positive", it helps everything in this life.

Dr. Giggles
08-12-2008, 11:20 AM
I wrote that down Jim, and i thank you. That is VERY good advice if i do say so myself.

Thanks VERY MUCH for that


-Zackary J

08-30-2008, 02:12 PM
This all depends on what the person looks like!

The last (INSERT DESCRIPTION OF PERSON HERE (try to be slightly insultive)) who came here made a tasty treat... Pause and roll head then jump and scream at the customer

For example

The last fatso who came here made a tasty treat... LIKE YOU WILL

Jim Warfield
09-04-2008, 07:29 PM
"Ever been here before?"
"How did you find out about this place?"
"We were told by a friend."
"My business slogan is :"Bring your friends, send your enemies."
(Now they are wondering???)
"Are children $12.00 too!?"
"These are sticker-tickets but they don't stick very well to leather of vynl, so don't put them on your underware!"
"Can you make it real scary, Mister? I like to get scared."
"NO!" I yell out from the ticket window sending him jumping straight up into the air infront of his parents and friends.
In October I only see my customers in the first room (drat!) but if I can greet them, inform them, scare them a few times and make them laugh a few times , all within a ten minute period, I feel I have impressed them.