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  • #31
    There were some big bikers who cruised passed my house on Sunday afternoons for several years, not daring to come in and check it out.
    Then that one fatefull sunday as I was talking with them(and they were still hesitant, couldn't decide, a local family of very young blondie-headed little girls came running down the street waving their ticket money saying, "We're coming in the haunted house!"
    The girls were maybe 4, 6, 9 years old.
    The big biker sort of gulped and said, "OK, I guess we will come in."

    Most bikers are just out for the ride and stop to eat buy a beer and that's about all. To "abandon" their bike in my lonely parking lot is too terrifing to consider for many of them.....
    ....even though the parking lot is located at the end of a dead end street with no houses nearby (except mine)
    99.9% of the time the bike parked here might get sunburnt or rust up long before anything else bad would ever happen to it.
    hauntedravensgrin.com

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    • #32
      One type of customer I can't stand is the guy(s)-who-try-to-sneak-in. I encountered a trio of em' just last week. I was peering around a corner to see if a new group had come in. Well, a group did come in, but something was a miss.....they had no guide. I went back into a nearby corner of the hall I was peering out of and did my best manequin impression under a dim light. After a bit of waiting, they eventually got to where I was. "Is it real? The shadow moved right?" They spent the next 12 seconds staring at me; until they decided to move on. Though the eye holes of my mask I could see one of them turn around and give me one more look, "Wait, is it moving!?" At this time I took it upon myself to jump out and stick my landing with a large *THUD*. Needless to say, they didn't stick around for very long.
      Last edited by Smiley; 10-11-2007, 01:15 AM.

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      • #33
        I've gotten a couple of good ones so far this year. At the top of the list has to be a girl running through the body bags near my room screaming "suck my big toe!", followed by "I've got aids, don't touch me". I've been smacked on the butt, had one person walk over and poke my forehead to see if I was real, had two pat me on the head and say "Aww, aren't you cute", and one ten year old boy threaten to put me through a wall. I also had a girl ask me to follow her through the house even though she was obviously scared of me, and another ask "is that a girl or a ghost" when I was all of two inches from her face. Best of all was the woman who saw my mop darting around the corner and refused to go through!

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        • #34
          I've always been fond of answering the 'how much do you get paid line with 'all I can eat' followed by a snarling advance.

          If the person making propositions is of age, stay in character, but smile and leer. Use lines like 'I'd love to see you stripped of that skin'

          I look at most of these lines as nervous bravado--something that can be exploited.

          I was going to say I hated being touched, but that'd be a lie. I like to do the still pose, mimicking something fake.

          Sometimes it gets me poked and even slapped. Know how hard it is to stay still after getting whacked in the face...just long enough to cement the idea in the head of the person who smacked you that there's no way you're real.

          I don't like people who try to pick fights with the animatronics

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          • #35
            RE: Don't you just hate...

            A new thing that's become more prevalent this year among our patrons is the annoying belief that since I have a handlebar moustache (both in character and in real life) that it must be a fake. Since I'm fairly up close with the customers when I talk to them, there are people who want to poke at it or try to tug at it. I've already drawn up plans for a new t-shirt for next year, with a picture of my moustache and the words, "Yes it's real and NO, you can't touch it!"
            "We all go a little mad sometimes..."

            - Norman Bates

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            • #36
              is it fake?

              I'm reminded of a haunt some 10 years or so ago when I worked as a tech and "security" (sure was a surprise to me!). The other techs and I would trade off going through the house and manning a highly visual spot in the house just to keep an eye on things.
              So this ditzy woman approaches me asking what I'm supposed to be. She couldn't tell from the "civvies", radio, ID badge and flashlight that I was working there - "I'm security". Then she starts sticking her finger in my once-full beard (a HUGE personal space violation!) asking "what's this?" All I could do is look annoyed and say "It's called a beard".

              Some people are so clueless!!!

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              • #37
                Don't you just hate it when the intoxicated female customer who isn't bad looking gives the guy in the electric chair a lap dance and not you?

                Happened last saturday, at least she tried to make out with my mask so it's not like i didn't get any action.

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                • #38
                  Ah, the drunks, forgot about them. Last night I ran into one, kinda wish I hadn't.

                  Man, she was a mess. Her husband had vise-like grip on her shoulders, perhaps to keep her from falling down. "Hey, hey, whattar you suppose to be? Ah, he's not scaury. I bet I could scare hem. Oogalago!" On top of that, she was wearing thrice as much make-up as me!




                  Now, that's scary.
                  Last edited by Smiley; 10-20-2007, 01:00 PM.

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                  • #39
                    Smiley your right we get the drunk in there.. Guiding them around you can smell it on thier breath. I just hope they are not driving themselves..

                    Again you can tell which ones are always on 'something else' when they hit strobe lights!

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                    • #40
                      drunk chicks

                      Oh, Gawd! The absolute worst!!
                      A few years back, this one drunk chick - and isn't that sooo attractive? - who was on a blind date (I believe, lucky him) with her sister and her guy, came though our haunt which was set up at the end of the hayride. She could hardly stand, let alone walk. Completely embarassed her companions to the point where they just ditched her, leaving us to take care of her, thankyouverymuch! Not even 1/4 way through the house she asks one of our actors "yuh wanna make out?" Then promptly threw up in the scene. My, my, who could resist that?
                      We let the cops take care of her lodging. We may have just left her in the enormous swamp surrounding the haunt!

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                      • #41
                        Don't you just hate it when a 7 or 8 year old threatens to murder you.

                        It was pretty funny, i jumped out at him, you could tell he was scared. He then proceeded to say that he'd murder me.

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                        • #42
                          My room is where the master of the haunt skinned his victims. therefore, being a 4D haunt, we use the scent of rotting flesh...I get some fun ones that I cant stand anymore

                          1. Did you s*** yourself?
                          2. You smell like feet! (scary that most people compare rotting flesh to feet)

                          And dont you love the drunks and crackheads. I had to fill in for the lead once and (our haunt uses 3 d glasses that react with our makeup) we had a guy so high that he tried to run away from me...through a completely full closet....I ADMIT IT...I broke the no touch rule there....drunk bikers are so fun there....got in a fight with them lol...good times...I especially love it since my character is completely harmless...oh well it comes with the territory lol

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                          • #43
                            Ah, here's a few more chaps I forgot to mention:

                            Mr. Hey-If-Someone-Can-Sue-Over-Hot-Coffee-I-Can-Make-An-Buck-In-Here. When I hear about this kind of person in haunts, I don't think of him being a bratty 14 year old. Well, surprised was I when I saw him walk in.

                            I was peering out of the make-up room door to see if anyone was around. Didn't want patrons to see "behind the scenes" when I open the door to walk out. There was a small group of three Jr. High kids being lead by one of our guides just outside the door. The only guy of the group said, "Your eyes, they're so fake. See how fake they are?" (referring to the guide's prosthetic). The guide then told him that if he continues to disrupt the tour, he would be lead out of the haunt. "I swear if anyone touches me, I'll sue. I'll sue and then they'll be sorry."

                            Once they left, so did I. After I walked through the haunt's "actor shortcuts" I got into a new spot to scare; next to the strobe/collapsing hallway. I would stand behind a corner, wait until I saw them coming, turn the corner, and try to go through them. "Out of my way, out of the way!" Cheap now that I think about it, but has worked in the past.

                            Soon after I got into position, I heard the chatter of a group walking down the hallway. So I did just what I planned, but in my haste under the strobe lighting I brushed up against someone by accident (our haunt has a no-touching rule). As I ran out of the hallway I hear, "That's it! I'm suing!". It was the same kid as earlier. Huh, imagine that.

                            So, did he go through with his lawsuit? Of course not. All bark and no bite. HA!

                            While we're on the subject of so called "tough guys":

                            In the last section of the haunt, I was chasing a group out the exit. When a kid, possibly 8 or 9, turns back and spouts, "You're retarrrrrrded. R-E-tarded." Isn't that rude....Well, I'm going to have teach this kid a lesson in manners. So I charge straight for him with my voice growling up something fierce. He jumps back and nearly trips over his parents feet. He collects himself and says, "Y-yeah!? Well...come on. Scratch me, right here." pointing at his cheek. So I ape-walk over to this tiny guy and lunge my "claws" an inch from his face. "Ahh!" *pant* *pant*

                            Seems like he didn't like that.....good.
                            Last edited by Smiley; 09-08-2008, 08:43 PM.

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                            • #44
                              One fine summer afternoon I was talking with the parents beside my house as their strange son was petting or trying to pet Mr. Tuxedo (spookhouse cat)
                              To get his need for his parent's attention filled, the boy runs over to us and tells us the cat scratched him!!!
                              I looked at his skin, no blood, not even a mark of any kind. I said, "did he scratch you like this?" I took my hand and moved it like a cat's claw might move.
                              "Yes, that's it, that is how he clawed me!"
                              Then I told them that Mr. Tuxedo had no front claws (which he doesn't)
                              The kid got this shocked and perplexed expression across his face, he knew that he had been caught!
                              I should have sung him a song from my childhood, "liar,liar, pants on fire!"
                              Mr. Tuxedo would get blamed for that too, even though there was no smoke or fire.
                              Maybe a wolf could follow him home? "Wolf" as in"the little boy who cried"?
                              hauntedravensgrin.com

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                              • #45
                                I REALLY hate when I get proposals and asked how much I get paid (which is nothing =[ ) !!!! I mean its quite funny but from my area, i can't see any of the audience cuz of the bright lights shinning on me...so i cant even see the people who propose haha. But it deffinatly ruins it for the rest of the paying customers and the actors as well. It makes me feel so out of character..i'm trying to BE the character and they just broke that barrier you know. lol o well, what can you do? =/

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