Advice on what to say?

[Dr. Giggles]

Hey everybody,

This year im Playing Nic Nak the Klown. Im a wonderer in a HUUUUGGGE haunt, roughly 10,000 square feet. My character is an acute schizophrenic who talks to himself inccessantly, scary, loud and always willing to play a game...or atleast thats as far as iv gotten with the chracter. But im honestly kind of sick of running up to people screaming in their face then skipping off. I need an ideas for lines i can say to people. Because in this haunt i need to divert their attention for an extended period of time. So i need lines that i can pick on people with. HELP!

Thanks everybody.

-Zackary J

[phreakout]

Dont you love my family? whats wrong? did we scare you? YOUR GOING TO LOVE MY FAMILY, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT?? YOUR NEXT!!!


do you smell that fresh blood in the air? Im so thirsty now....I gotta feed....
Im so hungry.....wait....CAN I HAVE YOURS???


IM SO READY FOR TONIGHT!!! I've been ingesting gasoline all day today!!! you wanna see my final act? DO YA????

(pull out lighter, and begin to light it, with your mouth open)

KABOOOMMM!!!!! WAAAA HA HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!


nik nak, paddy wack, give the dead a bone,
are you ready to SEE HELL!?!

[Dr. Giggles]

I really like those lines! Thanks for the help Phreakout! Its really usefull!

Thanks a bunch! Its really appreciated!


-Zackary J

[phreakout]

I really like those lines! Thanks for the help Phreakout! Its really usefull!

Thanks a bunch! Its really appreciated!


-Zackary J

I was actually planning to be a clown this year, so I came up with those a while back. Now that my roles have changed, I've gotta come up with more. I do plan to use that gasoline one though

[Jim Warfield]

"Do you think that this is "Grease Paint?"
No, it's much fouler than that, it's "Crease" paint!
Take a whiff as I slip you a kiss, see if you can identify which crease it came from?

[Dr. Giggles]

I want to scare them, not make them sick Jim....


haha but its appreciated anyway.

-Zackary J

[Jim Warfield]

"Crease paint" would not be something normally heard in everyday conversations, which might make it "scary" to many people as they doubt your grip on sanity.
I actually think fewer words of any kind, the better, then substitute a long look, and small movements of the face, creating usually an aukward silence. This is something that I would love to try sometime, if I didn't have to be talking non-stop for 90 minutes+plus for every tour, that is....
Tonight during the front room act (in total darkness) I was speaking slowly with a sing-song quality , then hesistating making a little whispy laugh, I'd stop the laugh, they would think I was going to continue talking, then after a pause, I would laugh again, the same laugh, sort of like I'm catching my breath.
I alternate the true haunted history telling with unrelated goofy remarks and punctuate the true storys with funny comments and changes in voice inflections and even walk around the room on my knees illustrating my "Short little walk" I took to the county courthouse a block from here to check old records on my house.
I also will alternate slow speaking with long pauses with very quick speaking adding some rhyming and alliteration, alternating low, commanding tones with other voices, all pretty much carried on in a totally dark room, I hold the little flashlight and use it to accent and punctuate my performance.
Ever met a scary street person?
Ever been locked in a totally dark room with one?
A room that he knows by heart because it's his room?
See where I find the show and the fear here?
If they still need a new person to play "The Joker", who else besides me has been practising this every night for 20 years?
(Insert laugh-track here~~~~~~!)

[MMManiac]

When I was a clown in my haunt I inproved alot depending on how the people were acting I loved to insult people. It was entertaining and made everyone else laugh. I figured I would piss off a person or two, but it never happened

[Jim Warfield]

I always liked the insult:"Don't get into a battle of wits if you have no ammunition!" (Your position will be overrun by infidels!)

"You're CrazY!"
"But You paid Me to be in MY House!?"

[phreakout]

After watching The Dark Knight, I seriously plan to act as insane ledger did in the movie.


...you wanna know why I use a knife?...