This season's Stupidest Customer!

[Jim Warfield]

A group of young women were there in the parking lot looking at the house on a busy Saturday night.
One of them asked my wife:"Do you have MASKS in there?"
"Yes we do."
"If I see a mask, I faint right away!"
????
Sort of like going to a car dealer and asking if his cars have tires on them.
"I faint when I see a car with tires on them! Take off all the tires!"

Some idiots are born, some are made. Some of them find there way here,,,,
tune in again friends for the continuing saga.
No entry for her.

[Smiley]

She's afraid.....of masks.....huh.



Well then, I'll just- OMG it's the Cat!




He's come back to reap his dark harvest! The Horra, the horra!

[spookologist]

We had one last night asking... "do they scare you in there?"

[Jim Warfield]

I was standing just inside the entrance to the Ravens Grin last week as a boy about 14 was passing me sandwiched inbetween others (fairly helpless) he looked at me and asked, "Is this going to be scary?"
This calm, 59 yr. old man (me) wearing no make up or mask, smiling, looking friendly suddenly frowned and said very loudly, "NO!"
Which of course did scare him alot.
Sometimes at the ticket window I pretend to break down and cry when some idiot asks if it's scary? (I am SO Scared!")
Our ticket window is the back door of a 1958 Ford, we roll the window down to sell from, they see my face and not much elses through this little opening so sometimes I try to foo them and say that the rest of my body fills up the entire house!
Some little kids begin to believe this sometimes.
Fun! Fun! Fun!

[The Doctor]

We had a lady pull one of the owners aside the other night and stated she had a complaint. She said the actors were screaming at her and her daughter that they were going to kill them and keep them. The owner looked at her and said I guess if you were afraid of the dark you would want us to turn on all the lights? She just turned around and left.

I had two older ladies ask me what was under the doctors coat then bend over and back into me. I just walked off laughing in my doctor laugh and one came up and double hand grabbed my butt. My poor assistant just looked at me and went you just got molested. It just amazes me the things people do in a haunted house.

We had a lady last year pull out a beer, open it and start drinking it in line. We have police all over the haunt. To say the least she had a very short stay. It just amazes me. Lets here some more stories, I love reading them.

The Doctor

[Jim Warfield]

Of course THE dumbest thing any customer can say to me is :"You can't kick me out of this haunted house!"
Wanna bet?
HAHAHAHAHA!

[floater]

stupidest customer

Ah, how to pick JUST ONE! There's so many a season, sometimes in a night, and even in an hour!
The one young teen girl with a group commenting on our Gypsy-costumed ladies - "we're Christians and we don't believe in Gypsies!" (speaking for the group, or just yourself, darlin'?) That one statement was so bizarre that it's impossible to have an answer for it.
Or - "you can't touch me - you're not allowed" Best answer - "I'm security, I can touch you as hard as I want." Perhaps a little much, but it stopped an aggresive twit dead in mid-tantrum.
The drunk chick out on a blind date wanting to make out with our actors, then throws up in one of the scenes and is promptly ditched by said blind date, her sister and her date. Left us to deal with her. Helllllooooo officer!
They DO stand out in our memories, but luckily don't overshadow the other 99% of the fun!

[Greg Chrise]

That's so sad little girl, the Gypsies believe in you.

[Jim Warfield]

One night two "Romeos" that worked for me arrived to here with two little Bimbos they found somewhere.
The girls went through the house then thought they could just "Hang around" inside while the guys worked. No.
When these guys were done for the night they drove away leaving these two girls they brought behind!?
About 1 AM. they talked another guy who worked here and his wife into driving them "Home" 45 miles away.
As they were driving up and down the streets of this distant town at 2 AM they asked the girl if she knew where she lived?
Then she confessed that the one guy who ditched her lived in one of these houses and they she lived ten miles away in another town!

If you have no experience hiring people, be warned! There will be many situations and dramas that come with many people and these things subtract from job performance!

[monsterwax]

I get people asking if it's "really scary" all the time. (Well, a few times each season, at any rate.) I give my most sincere facial expression and say, "Of course not! This is a haunted house. We only have monsters, madmen and murderers, with a few ghosts sprinkled on top. If you want SCARY, you need to wait a month or so and go to the mall. They have this giant fat man covered with thick, white hair and wearing a blood red suit. He'll try to get you to sit on his lap and tell him how naughty you are. He'll start spying on you, and then, in the dead of winter, late at night, he'll sneak into your house while you sleep. He'll leave little gifts to prove he's been there. Some say it's to show you can never escape his reach. Others say it's a communist plot to redistribute the wealth. Whichever it is, he's obviously INSANE, but no one seems capable of stopping him. Now THATS SCARY!" (Fortunately, I don't recall a child ever asking me that. I guess the answer is too obvious for them to bother.)

[Jim Warfield]

As soon as the mad man in the red suit crosses that line and begins pulling down his pants to leave us presents (he ran out of coal?) then it will hit the fan and he will be tracked down by law enforcement...that's what often happens when you leave DNA behind, from the behind?