An Inflatable TURD!

[Greg Chrise]

The oughts? Mark Twain is that you?

[dungmaster]

All generalizations are false, including this one.

Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.

Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today.

Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.

Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is certain.

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.


I could keep going, but I think that's enough Mark Twain for today.

[Greg Chrise]

Okay, I consider myself Twainasized.

[dungmaster]

For the record, we have the 70's, 80's, 90's, and then what? The 00's, which I call the oughts. I could call them the 2000's but that seems more of a pain. Sorry, but I'm not Mark Twain.

[Greg Chrise]

I'm pleasantly pleased that you are not Mark Twain because I can't find any jug band smack down turn of the century glow stick videos on Utoob.

Maybe gas lamps would have been used wearing little pieces of mirror, people running around on fire, reflective glass backed with silver or they might have smeared themselves with lightening bugs? Real uranium dust and cork hats. The original story of Tron by Mark Twain but, then the tale would only have been written about long hand in pen and ink to someone famous like President Roosevelt to actually get noticed.

Then the manuscripts would have been stored in Warehouse 13. Then I would know about it cause that's on the HULU. And it would have meant I was talking to dead people on the internet. I think I am relieved that I'm not posting turd post threads with Mark Twain. Thanks for clearing that up.

I'm gonna go stick an ice pick in my skull to get some sleep now. Bye.

[dungmaster]

First, I think sticking an ice pick in your skull may lead to permanent sleep.

The 2000's could be called the Oh-Oh's.

I think these people may have smeared themselves with lightning bugs, and they are singing about disco sticks (sorry, not glow sticks). They also seem to keep forming inflatable turds with their hands every so often. I'm trying. Hope you are still with us tomorrow.

[Greg Chrise]

I'm pretty sure this thread is going to keep going down the highway with the left turn signal on all the time.

[dungmaster]

At least this thread doesn't have the f-word in the title like some I've seen recently, and others I've seen have people yelling at each other in writing.

You're still alive, ice pick in the skull and all. How many ice picks are in your thick head?

Thirty minutes until the lunar eclipse begins.

And now that they have those wonderful cement pilings all along our highways, there should be no reason to have your left turn signal on while on the highway, especially if you're in the left lane, but I guess if you just made a lane change into a left lane, you could have had it on and forgotten if you can't hear it.

I am more afraid of running into those pilings than I ever was afraid of having somebody hit me head-on from the other side of the highway. I guess I should add that to that other thread they spoke of earlier in this thread:

http://www.hauntworld.com/haunted_ho...ead.php?t=5501

Remember the good old days when you could actually drive on the medians of highways? Kidding! I'm tired, but I'm going to go look for that red moon soon.

More on inflatable turd haunts soon.

[Jim Warfield]

"Inflatable Toilet!"

Matching set-piece to...The Inflatable Turd" (Sinister Scents? Are you picking-up on your potential business tie in here?)
"Oh, walking through the inflatable toilet isn't scary."
Then the tour guide says, "I forgot to tell you...look up!"
And there...under the rim..... THE Most Hideous collection of discolored scums and latent germs EVER imagined wait to fall upon you, even possibly slithering down your throat because you craned your head back so far looking as to open you mouth involuntarilly.
Then the worker in the toilet tank control room watching the video camera yells into the microphone as he pushes the button, "Bombs Away!"
The nasty nuggets of yesterday's splash-backs drop as everyone in the bottom of the bowl run down the bowl's slippery throat.
And they all came in because of the fib on the sign outside that promised motorcycles would be running in endless circles inside the edge of the bowl!
Of course those loud speakers outside with motorcycle engine noises playing help too.
False advertising to set them up for the scare........never been done before, at least not on That Planet.
Mr. Tuxedo Haunted Industrys conqueouring the solar system!

[dungmaster]

I don't think an inflatable toilet like this one would let much in the way of crowds through (I think we need a bigger inflatable potty):

[darkXmoon]

[dungmaster]

And they all came in because of the fib on the sign outside that promised motorcycles would be running in endless circles inside the edge of the bowl!
Of course those loud speakers outside with motorcycle engine noises playing help too.
False advertising to set them up for the scare........never been done before, at least not on That Planet.

So instead of motorcycles, how about combination motorcycle/hearses like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwcTNT1tXF8

[Greg Chrise]

[dungmaster]

Wow! I have a hunch that you are actually Sheldon but have somehow managed to transport yourself back in time, stranded on Gilligan's Island so you have no TV, no means to communicate,...

But wait! The Professor somehow finds a way to give you internet service, so you finally have news from the outside world. You also have a phone that only works when one of you happens to pick it up during an incoming call because it has no dial, no ringer, and no answering machine. Unfortunately, you soon learn that life could be miserable if you don't find the resources that surround you and use them quick:

[Jim Warfield]

For the first three years.

I had No Phone here. Too busy working on this house to waste the time listening to jibber-jabber.
I had just spend the previous 15 years answering my phone , then driving to fix things for people and I was basically on-call almost 24/7/365.
I don't miss that at all. 3am, "0" outside, cold, unmoving truck seat, the drive through deep snow, the drive back to scrounge up some parts to make things work again, get back to bed at 4:30, wake up at 7 go back at it!
All for a very tiny amount of $.
Yes, I was working for "Family" and alot of the people calling were elderly and thought $3.00 for a service call was pretty high for them to pay!
Pretty stupid huh? Us, them.